how many muggle born kids showed up at hogwarts like, “i get you’re into magic and don’t get me wrong, magic is awesome, but please don’t try and tell me quills and inkwells make more sense than pencils. i realize you have an aesthetic going, but admit it’s that. admit it’s just for looks.”
The leaves are starting to change! Happy autumn everyone!
Fort Worth Star-Telegram / Tuesday August 22, 2000
ok so what if Harry and Neville got into like this passive-aggressive lie-off regarding what a truly great man Severus Snape was like they got drunk and Harry was like ‘Snape though’ and Neville was like ‘I know right’ and Harry was like ‘what a… what a fantastic bastard. What a guy.’ and Neville was like ‘we should fuckin’ get him like, like… let’s have a funeral. A huge fucking fuck-off sized funeral with like, lilies, and, a marble coffin, and a big statue, an’ crying women, an’ all that shit’ and Harry got whiskey up his nose laughing so hard and he falls off his stool and just wheezes 'lillies'
and then during the funeral Neville and Harry like spend the whole time trying to give a better eulogy like they keep getting back up after each other are done to try and have another go at it but then they get schooled by Hermione being like ‘for fuck’s sake boys this is how it’s done’ and she goes up to the podium and just bursts into wild banshee hysterics and throws herself across the glistening marble casket, sobbing ‘oh, it should have been me, would to god that it were me, you stallion of a professor’ and all the reporters tear up a little and then go home to pen really fervid biopics on this bleakly noble and tragically overlooked hero of the revolution
anyway like eighteen years later Harry names his kid after Severus and sends an owl off to Neville like ‘your move, mate’ and Nevill pauses in the middle of polishing the giant marble statue of Snape tenderly cuddling an armfull of adoring woodland creatures that dominates like 2/3 of his office to cuss a lot and pour himself another drink
Rare Harry Potter Illustrations From The Book’s Artist.
Platform nine and three quarters was shut
my favorite thing i’ve ever realized about harry potter is that the gryffindor and slytherin tables are supposed to be on opposite ends of the great hall???
and therefore every time draco is making a scene at a meal (HEY POTTER HAVE YOU SEEN THE DAILY PROPHET??? HEY POTTER I’M MAKING STUPID FACES AT YOU BECAUSE THE DAILY PROPHET SAYS YOU’RE MAD!!! HEY POTTER I’M PRETENDING TO FAINT AT THE SIGHT OF A DEMENTOR LIKE YOU DID!!!!) he is making an extraordinary effort to be noticed across the entire hall
or harry is making an extraordinary effort to notice him
in my mind it always escalates into them standing on the tables and shouting at each other over the entire school
EXCUSE ME POTTER EXCUSE ME HAVE YOU NOTICED ME YET
NO MALFOY I HAVE NOT NOTICED YOU I NEVER NOTICE YOU GOD THERE’S MALFOY AT THE SLYTHERIN TABLE DOING A THING AGAIN GOD FUCK MALFOY HE’S ALWAYS DOING THINGS WHERE I CAN SEE HIM…THROUGH…CROWDS OF STUDENTS SEATED AT 4 TABLES…I DON’T NOTICE MALFOY…HE’S LOOKING REALLY ILL LATELY IS HE OKAY DO YOU THINK